autumn in rain

except for winter, autumn is my favourite.

i love the falling of leaves, the changes, the soft wind and everything for the season.

but, this autumn, i lost my desiration.

if he just know how much i actually care.

if he just know how much i actually love.

if he just know how much i actually want to go for him.

if he just know i cant let go with him.

if he just know how much is his love.

if he just know everything at here doesnt change.

i miss.

i care.

i jump.

i laugh.

i run.

i feel the vivid things.

i feel for life.

i feel for pain.

i feel for numb.

i feel tears.

i feel everything clearer, deep in my heart after he gone.

how about the curse?

deeply in my heart.

i nearly forget it these months.

whenever i tried, it jumped up.

spinning in my head.

i feel like i am the autumn leaf.

dropping from the tree, down to the ground, eventually nothing.

nothing at all at last.

at last.

i like autumn.

but,

i dont like what i'm feeling now.

i like him.

but,

i dont like the way he adopted me.

the thing seems right at first.

now in the opposite way.

when will this last?

a day?

a week?

a month?

a year?

or forever?

am i going to miss you in my life forever?

what you have did just remind me always.

that i am alone.

alone at all without you.

i still stick to coffee.

i still stick to my favourites.

i still stick to...

you.